Shower Martyr Mom Stinky

Am I stinky compared to you?

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Shower or stay stinky
Am I stinky or do I smell sweet?

I’m clean today.

I’ve showered.

I did my hair.

I brushed my teeth.

I put on earrings and a watch (my version of fancy nowadays)

Each day I get dressed as if I’m going to leave the house.

I’m not always clean.  In fact, it seems like some days I don’t recall when the last time I showered was.  This is the downside to working from home and having both your kids, and your spouse with you daily.

They all love to shower and do so whenever they feel like it.  It’s nice to be them.

Sam showers every single morning at 9am on the dot.   If I am thinking of getting up right before or after this time I decide to just get dressed because I know that this is his scheduled time.  If he doesn’t get it, his day doesn’t start off right.  He also takes a hot Epsom salt bath each night after Dance.

Shawn takes 2-3 showers a day.  Usually around 8am or so after his morning run.  It not exactly the same time every day but this is close.  Then, usually at night, he showers because, well – just because.  There is sometimes a 3rd shower in the middle or late at night if he’s feeling itchy or hot.  Generally his showers are hot but short and sweet.

Alex.  Oh Alex.  Every day she asks “So, is anyone planning on doing laundry or taking a shower?” She asks this question because she is a hot water hoarder.  She will use every last bit of hot water possible.  It’s not often she just takes a quick shower.  And now that she’s getting into bath bombs, we can start adding baths to her schedule

For some reason I don’t tell them that I have dibs.  It’s my turn!  I want all the hot water!  I smell.  I mean, I don’t really ‘smell, smell’ but I might not be as clean smelling as I would like to be.


As mothers and wives, we tend to put ourselves last.

I am honestly not a martyr.  I don’t make my excessively showering family feel bad that I’m stinky.  Maybe they feel guilty sometimes when I kind of look deflated that I didn’t get in when I wanted but It’s really not their fault that I don’t demand my own time or just take it at 6pm or midnight when I know that no one else is showering.

I don’t like showering late at night and then going to bed with wet hair because I don’t want to wake Shawn up with the blow dryer.

I don’t like showering after I’ve already gotten dressed for the day either.  Something about that is weird to me.  I don’t want to put on the same outfit I had on (whilst I was smelly) nor ‘waste’ a new outfit to only wear for a couple of hours.

I would prefer to take my shower in the morning, before getting dressed for the day.

On the plus side, my skin isn’t as dry or as itchy as it was when I showered daily.

I decided to Google about ‘showering’

My favorite search garnered 129 Million searches.  “how often do people in various countries shower?”

I read a LOT of the blog posts, health articles and news reports on this topic.  Overall, American’s are ‘average washers’ and smack dab in the middle of the the most, and least, clean countries.

Here’s what I learned:

  • I’m not as dirty as I thought I was.
  • Columbians, Brazilians, Mexicans and Australians seem to be the most obsessive showering people
  • Indonesians take more sponge baths than anything else.
  • Most people in all countries don’t generally wash their hair every time they shower.
  • Men from Sweden shower more than their women.  Sweden is the only country where men take more showers than women
  • Chinese and UK citizens take less showers and wash their hair less than almost all other countries
  • Most hygiene products have been pushed on ‘us’ only in the past century by telling people they have “body odor” or “bad breath” so we feel like we need to use more products, and more often.  Win for these businesses.
  • Too much washing kills your good bacteria and natural oils.
  • French people are just as clean/dirty as Americans.
  • There is a movement of people of all ages and races among many cultures and countries to not use soap or chemicals – ever.  Just water, sponges and what nature gave them.
  • Many people shower like me, every few days and they work outside the home.  I read one story about a 55yr old female corporate CEO of an organic skin care line who showers 3 times a week or less and doesn’t use deodorant.
  • I don’t wear deodorant – ever, but do like to wear perfume sometimes (and no, it’s not to mask my stink)
I'm not Smelly, I smell great after a shower
I’m not Smelly, I smell great

I learned even more about cleanliness across the globe but what I came away with most was that I should shower when I need or want to.  Not because I’m supposed to per society or even use more product than works for me.  I’m not part of any movement saying “hell no, I won’t wash!” or anything however, I do feel like sometimes we (women) have certain ideals thrust upon us from others expectations, commercials, media, men, our society and culture.

I will continue to do me but sometimes when I want to shower and take my turn, I will tell everyone that It’s my Turn and they can adjust around me if necessary.





1 thought on “Am I stinky compared to you?”

  1. I agree that showering at night, as a girl, is kind of awful. You have wet hair clinging to you while you are trying to sleep, your pillowcase gets all wet and uncomfortable, AND you wake up with your hair in every different direction. AWFUL!

    Thank you for sharing these facts!

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